Sacrifice Identity

Journal Entry - April 17, 2012

Quote “...simply because we choose to sacrifice our identity for those we love
also speaks volumes as a defining characteristic. I may be a singer who provides
by waitressing but of all the labels implied, ultimately the single driving force is
I am one who loves and provides. I put myself in sacrifice for those I love.  I am
willing to sacrifice joy for love… and in this state I can say I am selfless.”
(quote source not identified in journal)

“...I am willing to sacrifice joy for love… and in this state I can say I am selfless.”   
Which seems to me to be the ultimate goal. I long to become less so others and
Jesus can become more..

The Question is:  What’s True?

------Um, OMG, I’m not sure!  There are so many nuances to this disease I feel
I have lied to others.  It’s just too laborious to lay out all the facts. Plus, I don’t
get an invitation to be completely factual.

It’s easier for me to just say “I fell”  rather than relay the whole scenario leading
up to the bruises.  It’s so complex and convoluted in my own brain. I don’t
understand or, at times, even know the “me” that is living this illness.  Many times
I feel like I am a spectator in my own life, then I have to be reporter to explain all
the stuff I can’t explain to myself.