Coping strategies are ways to manage external or internal stress. When we experience stressors we change cognitive thought patterns and behavioral patterns in order to cope with the demands the stressor is placing on our bodies.
These strategies can be healthy or unhealthy to our emotional, cognitive and physical well being. They are almost always habitual, and we are usually unaware of many of our responses. A bad habit or an addiction are examples of unhealthy coping strategies. Even though they are unhealthy, they bring comfort and relieve the stressor. This makes the unhealthy coping strategies extremely difficult to replace with healthy ones. Coping strategies are unique to the individual. However, there are six coping strategies that apply generally to everyone.
1. Your Environment.
Don’t pollute or allow others to pollute your environment. This is difficult because it requires a lifestyle change. If you are an addict you must be brave enough to ask your friends and family not to use around you. You must not frequent places where the substance is being used. Sometimes you may have to change the type of entertainment you listen to, watch or read. The old adage GIGO, garbage in, garbage out, is a truth. In some cases, you may need to move to a new neighborhood or city depending on your current environment. This is your LIFE! This is serious and you are worth the best chance you can give yourself.
Triggers. Avoid your known triggers.
I’m sure you know what they are. If not give it some thought, and make a list. If the trigger is a person, you may need to either avoid the person or avoid them in certain situations.
Respect.
Treat yourself like you would treat other people. Be kind to yourself. Forgive yourself. Don’t expect perfection from yourself. Love yourself.
Distraction.
A two minute distraction is all it takes to stop the mind from brooding over a craving, stewing in anxiety, or mulling over depressing thoughts.
Socialization.
Loneliness is a health risk that some say is as dangerous as smoking. Create a regular social life with healthy, supportive people. Reach out. Don’t isolate yourself.
Power of No.
Learn to say “no” to others. You cannot be a people pleaser. You simply do not have the strength to always say, “yes.” Know your energy level, and say yes only if you really are able. Do not say, “yes” to just make the other person happy or to have them think well of you.
Your Unique Coping Strategies
The purpose of this exercise is for you to create as many things in lists as you are able. The list is of activities you can perform to de-stress. They become your new positive coping strategies. You can pick and choose from these activities when facing stress.
There is a rule that comes with behavioral coping strategies. The rule is DO IT even if you don’t FEEL like it. Frankly, you are not going to feel like doing these things. They push you out of your comfort zone. They force you away from your patterns of negative coping and everything in your brain is going to fight you. DO IT EVEN IF YOU DON’T FEEL LIKE IT. No excuses my friends.
Following, I provide my own lists. I hope this will help your own thought process as you create your lists. I have divided the lists into contemplative/peaceful activities, other-focus activities, and creative activities. Though not included as an example, a physical activities list would also be beneficial.
Contemplative & Peaceful Activities
Sometimes a stressor requires you to relieve anxiety and help infuse your being with peace. Make a list of things that give you a sense of inner peace, comfort or love.
Contemplative & Peaceful Activity List
Alias In Town’s List
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Your List
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Being in nature
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Reading Scripture
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Music
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Prayer
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Meditation
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Calling a family member or friend
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Taking a bubble bath
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Coloring
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Going to a bookstore
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Drinking a Chai tea in a real china cup
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Sometimes we increase stressors because our minds continually swirl around our own circumstances. You may find yourself thinking constantly about yourself. This doesn’t mean you are selfish. It is just one of the realities of this existence. Other-focused activities can take your mind off yourself. They will help the stress melt away.
Other-Focused Activity List
Alias In Town’s List
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Your List
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Pray for needs of others
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Write notes, emails or messages of encouragement
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Do a simple good deed or act of kindness
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Give sacrificially to a charity
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Play with my grandchildren
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Call someone to say you were thinking of them
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If you are able, do an errand for someone
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Please don’t see the word “creativity” and say “I’m not creative” and skip this section. Everyone is creative. It’s a human quality we all share. Sometimes it’s expressed in art and design, but most of the time it is expressed through projects and problem solving. Besides, even if you do want to express yourself artistically it can be for your own eyes and fun. I believe everyone is an artist.
Creative Activities List
Alias In Town’s List
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Your List
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Coloring, painting, drawing
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Sewing, crafting
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Organizing something
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Write your family history
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Research your family tree
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Ask your friends how they met and write their love stories
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Design website
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Use online tools to make grand-kids story books
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Fix that thing you’ve been putting off
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Find someplace local on the internet and go on an adventure
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Take your camera and: - Take pictures of something starting with every letter of the alphabet - Photograph anything that looks like a face - Get a snapshot of something from every color in the rainbow - Capture the phases of the moon for a month - Create some before and after photos
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Start an art journal or art journal Bible
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I sincerely hope the above information and activities are helpful to you in someway. It is time to be WELL.